Is There a Buffalo Chicken Epidemic in America?

March 28th, 2013

ZFarls is back to expose “Big Buffalo Chicken” for their push towards arming american citizens with mediocre buffalo chicken in all types of food. Farls thought the landscape was clear, so he wen’t away for a while. But after one too many bad buffalo meals, he is back with pictures exposing these restaurants for what they are, FRAUDS. His journey has taken him all across America, eating a variety of buffalo products, and he is back to share them all with you.

Today, ZFarls looks at “Does America Have a Buffalo Chicken Epidemic?”

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What is the worst buffalo product you have had recently? Leave it in the comments!

Do Buffalo Chicken Calzones Have Healing Powers?

December 14th, 2010

Sundays are for Buffalo Chicken Calzones, when you wake up and damn near collapse on your way to the bathroom, you know you only have once choice. You pound some water and go lay on the couch. Hopefully NFL football is just minutes away from starting and your xbox gets fired up.

Now, you only have a few mintues to get your order placed and you know what its GOTTA be. A buffalo chicken calzone is the answer because ITS THE WORLDS GREATEST HANGOVER FOOD.

Lets talk about it, its okay little buddy.

Bread- Shit will sop up any left over nastiness you ingested last night that hasn’t cleared your system yet.

Chicken – This will do all the heavy lifting and get rid of that empty feeling inside your stomach. If you order the large, it will potentially put you into a food coma (which is a good thing) and you can nap off the hangover and wake up feeling refreshed. Whether it be breaded, fried or white meat chicken you want to make sure your zone of choice is packed with it as it really takes the hunger pangs away.

Cheese- A true zone will be smothered in this shit no doubt. It gives it that nice and easy smooth taste that your beer last night didnt. Plus, it adds that grease factor that they body absolutley craves when you are hungover. I’d go into more detail but im not a scientist. (Not even sure how to spell the word in fact)

Blue Cheese – This dipping sauce is the most underrated peice for recovery. You can also use it on the onion rings that your ordered and will really help SOOTHE the stomach. Its basically like white pepto bismol and will keep you from being in pain later on the rebound.

Now, you do have many options when hungover but ultimately, a gallon of water and at minimal a small zone will do the trick.

Some days when I feel like extra shit, I will rock the following.

Buff Zone, Buff Fingers, Greek Salad, Onion Rings, Couple Slices. ( I make little pita sandwiches with buffalo fingers in there and devour.) Now you might not weigh as much as me, but your getting your salad, and veggies with the onions. The buff zone will knock you out. You also will have plenty for the 6 p.m. feeding time when your feeling better.

Now buff zones are a great reheatable food which is a whole nother post in itself, but we can work on that later.

At the end of the day, Buff Zones MUST be considered the worlds greatest hangover food, because even in a worst case scenario when you throw it up its still that damn good.

Been there, done that, got the t-shirt.

If you have a different food please post in the comments, also don’t forget to subscribe for more bvffalo action!

How Many Calories In A Buffalo Calzone?

September 29th, 2010

Buffalo Chicken Calzone is back and will be attempting to make more regular posts. Don’t worry we are still eating more calzones than is healthy, we just need to post more! Thanks.

The Worlds Greatest Question?

The Worlds Greatest Question?

Scholars have debated for centuries about just how many calories are in a buffalo chicken calzone. Now, when you think about just how big and delicious some of these items are, it makes you really wonder. Clearly buffalo calzones are more of a religious food and you shouldn’t be eating them if your worried about calories. Plus depending on just how big, or what type of chicken and cheese are used in the recipe can make all the difference.

Lets break down a large calzone from Georges Pizza in Natick.

Bread: The Shell that forms around all of the other calories, contains perhaps the most calories of the zone. The bread is that deliciously bad for you full of carbs kind and when lightly toasted creates the worlds most beautiful resting place for buffalo. Now, I would say on a small it is around 500-700 calories, But for a diesel large its gotta be 1500 just to be safe. Oh yeah, its COVERED IN CHEESE.

Bread – 1500 Cals , great start here

Chicken: Some restaurants have chosen to use white meat chicken in their calzones which is an absolute joke. If im gonna be eating 4 times my recommended daily caloric intake, it better be some chicken fingers in that bad boy.

Chicken: White – 1,000, Fingers 1,500 (Both are smothered in sodium anyway)

Cheese: Some on the outside, LOTS on the inside. I mean the whole things a cheese. I’ve even asked for extra cheese just to be a total asshole. Clearly, its dominant because the number one pick in our calzone draft always seems to be the one with a beautiful layer of cheese resting on top. This can’t be good.

Cheese – 500 (I hope)

Buffalo Sauce- Now franks red hot uses to its advantage a law that says less than 5ml serving size can contain no calories. So if you look at Franks and it has less than 5 calories per TINY serving, its listed as 0. DANGEROUS. Seeing as how I drank nearly a gallon in 2 months and I know that stuff has enough sodium to make the Dead Sea jealous. (But I guess no calories!)

Buffalo Sauce – 0! joking probably 100

Blue Cheese- The final monstrosity of the calzone is the blue cheese. A small comes with one dipping cup and a large with 2. Now blue cheese is insanely creamy and delicious however, its not exactly health food. While the mold helps me fight of disease and taste great its probably running at 500 calories per dipping cup. Eat a large and try not to use both, oh you did? Liar

Blue cheese – Somewhere between 500 and 1,000 depending on how hard your self medicating and hate yourself.

So lets take a tally at the numbers we have for a large calzone!

Bread – 1500

Cheese – 1,000

Chicken - 1,500

Sauce- 100 probably more like 250

Blue Chese 500 – 1,000

Total – 5,000 Depending on just how stuffed and delicious your calzone is, it probably packs in 5,000 calories. If your a chronic dipper, this can really add to your intake. One good thing is Georges in not open late which means you can avoid eating this meal while hammered and adding on to your 1,500 calories from drinking.

However this raises another question that scholars have debated for years and even got an egyptian pharoh killed back in the day.

Are Buffalo Chicken Calzones the worlds best hangover food/cure?

Buffalo Product Power Rankings

June 23rd, 2010

After eating nearly every type of buffalo chicken product that I could get my mouth on for the last 10 years, I have decided to rank the ways to eat Buffalo Chicken Products. Below are the power rankings for all the buffalo products that I have encountered on my journey thus far, enjoy.

1. The Calzone

It was a monster

It was a monster

When done well,this item allows for maximum flavor and welcomes at least two types of cheese. The fill you receive from the deliciously toasted crust enables it to fill you up and is a great value. Despite the debate over styles and recipes, I think we can all agree Buffalo Calzones are the best buffalo variation ever.

2. Wings- The food that started my addiction to hot sauce remains dear to my heart. I feel that wings deliver the best true flavor although they don’t always fill me up. One area that I enjoy is being able to self medicate with blue cheese. This allows you to control the heat of the wings in question. So many flavors and spices but buffalo is the best of all.

3. Wrap- This item is responsible for allowing beginners into the field, however they can often be the most mediocre product and made by unqualified folk. Girls often enjoy these and I am all for them having buffalo, but if its not fresh and delicious than that is bull. Everyone is trying to capitalize on the market but not everyone has figured out the deliciousness yet.

4. Pizza- There is no universal recipe for this item yet, while most restaurants consider it gourmet, I hardly do. Where it doesn’t score points is in bringing true buffalo flavor out. It has solid chicken usually and allows for plenty of cheese which is where it gets its rank.

5. Tenders- More of a beginner item than the wing, tenders also suffer from many sucky incarnations. I admit that I enjoy the hell out of good tenders, but people try and pretend that the frozen ones don’t suck and that does a diservice to buffalo products everywhere.

6. Sub- When used with tender, this sub can deliver dynamic flavor and heat. Slather it up with enough blue cheese and this baby always seems to deliver. I fear mediocre variations, but my go to places always know how to serve it up just right. (Georges pizza, Natick and Linden store on fridays.)

7. Burrito-

Boloco Buffalo Chicken Burrito

Boloco Buffalo Chicken Burrito

While similar to a wrap, this white meat chicken item can deliver juicy flavoring and the fill that a wrap can’t. The rice is a make or break feature, but I feel that once you know what to expect than you can really start to enjoy a well made burrito.

8. Dip- This also has many variations which we will explore in future posts, It is a strong item and should always be present if men are sitting around drinking and speaking of heroic deeds.

9.Salad- I always order because I am in the mood for tenders, yeah it comes with some lettuce but I feel the layer of blue cheese does enough to cancel out the potential health benefits.

10. Cake? Would I? YUP

If there is something I missed or haven’t discovered yet or if you have a recommendation, let me know here. Thanks

*Also, I hope to cover all these items individually because I eat them in my rotation of foods. I need to take photos of them before I devour them.

Buffalo Chicken Calzone : The Worlds Greatest Food?

June 8th, 2010
The Most Beatiful Thing I've Ever Seen

The Most Beatiful Thing I've Ever Seen

When you order or create a buffalo chicken calzone, you are getting the worlds best ingredients all mixed into one easy and fun to eat taste full explosion. There are many factors that go into creating the ultimate calzone which we will explain later, however, I feel this blend of ingredients creates flavors like no other.

First you have the crust which is the shell for the other ingredients to lay so beautifully inside of. This can make or break a calzone but fortunately its pretty hard to mess up. Now one way to make sure the bread is a dynamic element is to cover it with cheese and buffalo chicken. You rarely want a bite that is not covered in cheese or creating a cocoon around chicken. The crust is the first thing you see when you open the box or pull it out of the oven. It always delivers a satisfying fill and holds things together.

I would say the next key element to the calzone is the chicken of course. Now there is no debate in my heart, however you will sometimes see people use white meat chicken or the breaded chicken fingers. I would absolutely recommend getting the fingers although there are rare exceptions where places can do it well enough with white meat. The problem with fingers is that they can dry out while baking if a place hasn’t perfected its recipe yet. White meat chicken rarely soaks in the juice and leads to you having to dip your bites into more hot sauce which I don’t hate but I’d rather not. When done properly, a chicken finger buffalo zone holds far more esteem in my heart than a white meat.

Buffalo sauce is the next ingredient that needs to be on the money. Some places just don’t understand what it should be. I have had recipes and sauces that are too sweet or not orange enough for my liking. I enjoy a runny nose from the heat, but Im not an ultimate hot eater. I think it should leave your mouth with just enough of a reminder that you ate a calzone. That’s why you get the next ingredient anyway.

Blue Cheese- This is a make or break element for a calzone. I have seen it be served warm which gives it a far to liquid consistency and can actually detract from the overall experience. I have seen ranched served on the side which is flat out wrong unless you order it specifically. This allows you to control the temperature and spiciness of your calzone and adds to the overall heart attack factor. Some places put the blue cheese inside and cook it which heats it up and adds to the messy factor. I am okay with this practice but wouldn’t include it on the calzone I will eat on my deathbed.

Mozzarella Cheese- This is most likely the easiest factor to get right. If in doubt always put more rather than less cheese. If you put some on the inside, don’t be afraid to get loose on the outside. Depending on your location you may see other kinds of cheese being used like ricotta so make sure you only getting the good stuff in your calzone. This is buffalo not Italian. When you get that beautiful cheesy top crust, you know your in for a beautiful calzone.

I feel that a properly prepared and fairly priced buffalo calzone is the top food on the planet. Nothing cures you from a hangover, fills you up, and is such a specialty item as a buff zone. I feel that anyone who is interested in buffalo flavor as a whole will love this food and website. Good luck in your quest to find the ultimate calzone and if you have any questions, hit me up at zfarls (at) hotmail (dot) com. (spam)

Deal With The Devil/Peddler

January 6th, 2010

If you could only eat one item for the rest of your life, what would it be?

You can either choose the Buffalo Chicken Wrap from Pizza Peddler

OR
You can have the Buffalo Chicken Calzone From Georges.

Yes Please

Now, some things to consider.
For a quick lunch meal, the Buff Wrap is optimal but when you are starving and really jonesin for some true buffalo flavor, a calzone is the only thing that will do.

The Wrap isn’t a true buffalo flavor and you would start to skew your taste and remembrance of buffalo.
The Chicken Filet they give you in the wrap is better but doesnt really lend itself well to Buffalo as they just drizzle the sauce on rather than shake the living shit out of it. (you should see the forearms)

So, just like the guy in the Miller Lite Commercial, if you could only have one for the rest of your life, what would it be? The zone or the wrap.

Im going zone BECAUSE it costs less, fills you up, cures hangovers and comes with blue cheese that you can dunk it till your hearts content (or failure). The lack of true buffalo flavor and self medication is a dealbreaker.

Leave a comment and let me know your choice.

Here is a picture of Buffs Pub Wings in Newton, I will review them later but they just may be the best wings around!

Buffs Pub Wings

Buff's Pub Wings

Why Buffalo Chicken Rules

December 27th, 2009

Alright, this is just a quick shoutout to remember that Buffalo Chicken Calzones are the greateast food on earth and you need to be eating them more and more.

If you try and encrust this in macadamia nuts, I will kick you in the nuts.

If you try and encrust this in macadamia nuts, I will kick you in the nuts.

Here is an excerpt from some jabroni that doesn’t know anything about food. They are reviewing the top 10 places in the USA to get either steak or seafood.  One of those places happens to be right here in Boston. lets check it out.

“We like to start by pairing traditional raw bar selections, such as ceviche three ways, with the sniffle-inducing spiciness of Thai-style lettuce wraps with hot chili sauce. Entrées are generous, and textures, colors and tastes are creatively intermingled on each plate. Dishes may include macadamia-encrusted swordfish, served with slightly chilled soba noodles and crispy spinach that dissolves in your mouth, or dry-aged New York strip sirloin with sweet soy, cilantro, ginger and red chilies, with matchstick potatoes.”

Wow, Really? You would honestly rather have that then a buffalo chicken calzone? Your settling into your couch on a nice crisp autumm sunday to watch some football and you would want to eat chilled soba noodles and crispy spinach? STOP IT.

Looks, maybe I take that new york stip sirloin and throw it in the calzone drenched in franks red hot, but if you put any sweet soy or thai lettuce wraps within a mile of me , I’ll probably throw up.  Plus, can you eat all that with your hands? Wheres the side cup of dipping sauce? Exactly, Now George may not technically be a 5 star chef, but in my book he can make me a calzone whenever he pleases.

Seriously, step up, what the hell is “ceviche”?

Tune in next week when we break down why a buffalo chicken calzone is the world’s greatest hangover food.

“crispy spinach that dissolves in your mouth” – Cotton Candy dissolves in my mouth too, but I stopped eating that years ago. Leave a comment if your with me, gimme a little A-Men!

Thanksgiving Myths BUSTED

November 23rd, 2009

They weren’t actually eating Turkey, it was a chicken. Although, it wasn’t just any chicken. It was one that was covered in a delicious red sauce with a lot of spice. No, I am not talking about blood, remember they loved each other right?

Buffalo Chicken was eaten at the first thanksgiving. However, everyone got small pox so the recipe was lost.

One great thing about the holidays is returning home and getting some of your old favorites such as the buffalo chicken calzone. This is a pretty region exclusive meal and one that should bring back warm memories amidst family time. Anyway, just want to wish all my readers a happy thanksgiving.

Tip of the month – If your turkey is a little dry, I HIGHLY Recommend making a combo of ketchup and franks red hot sauce mixed together. It adds a nice wetness and delivers that spice you have come accustomed to. It really adds to the flavor. Also make sure you make a potato volcano with Franks red hot as the LAVA. Your asshole will pucker due to the intense heat but its gonna be worth it in the end.

Future topics, are buff zones the worlds greatest hangover food? When is it socially acceptable to eat a buff zone? Tuesday night? Friday at 5? Sundays only?

Cheers

Pepperonchini’s Buffalo Chicken Pizza

October 13th, 2009

Well folks… A friday afternoon lunch before the long weekend can only mean one thing.

Food Coma

Now, since nobody will be doing work from 2-5 and you can’t be intoxicated, you basically get so jacked up on greasy food that you go comatose at your desk until 5  (or you crap yourself and go home early- been there, done that, got the t-shirt!)

But I digress, We headed out to Pepperonchini’s in Framingham, MA which is a local bar/food spot. (www.hotpizzacoldbeer.com) They have a good menu of sandwiches, pizza and other assorted pub food.

Pro’s - They posses some pretty dynamite steak tips, 25 cent wings during all Boston sports games, and 5 dollar cheese pizzas on Sunday’s to go along with their NFL Sunday ticket. They are open late and like the site suggests, they have hot pizza and cold beer as well.

Con’s- Late at night its more of a Bar than a food place and get pretty crowded, when the wings aren’t 25 cents.

The specific buffalo based item we will be breaking down today is the buffalo chicken pizza because that’s how we roll.

You gotta dunk that Sh*t

You gotta dunk that Sh*t

First noteworthy remark is that it comes with a pepperonchini in the middle which is a nice trademark. The buffalo chicken chunks are of good size and sauce proportions. They don’t dominate the pizza but you certainly feel that you are getting your money’s worth.

The wrinkle in pep’s pizza is the carrots and celery. Now celery has been done before I am certain but the carrot’s are a novel and new way to do this pizza. They don’t add alot but they are memorable and get people talking.

One way to add fun and calories (calories usually add taste and awesomeness to anything buffalo) is to get a side dipping cup of blue cheese. Now, they may already put a little blue cheese on the pizza but you are gonna wan’t to be able to self medicate and dunk they living crap out of your slice. Its tremendous, don’t feel shy, just ask and thy shall receive.

Now, the “Osiris” of the buffalo za Colin O’neil, would like to point out the proper method of crushing this pizza.

“Rip from the wheel, fold the long way and aggressively dip into the blue cheese bucket, enjoy”

This man is a hungry softball player who has conqured this pizza multiple times, (a week) – he also pointed out that “buffalo chicken pizza is here forever”

He notes that with the floppyness of this slice, he has seen many weaker men pop a wrist tendon circa nomar in 2001.  I have always said you must fold this beast or it will be flopping around worse than … no need to go there)

Overall, peps delivers solid value and an nice change of pace in the buffalo world. We will review their 25 cent wings in the future and always recommend when a game is on heading down to take advantage of their special. The wings are meaty and the sauce while not better than 7/10 is cool and you can devour them.

Good stuff, see you out there (when I get out of this food coma)

Restaurant Review : Antonio’s Pizza

July 28th, 2009

Location: Amherst, Mass

Antonio’s Pizza may have not only the world’s most beautiful slices, but the most delicious.

When walking into Antonio’s for the first time, one can become pretty intimidated. They have a glass case of pizza’s with various assorted slices.   You simply point out the slice(s) you want and they slide them in the oven. Next, walk up to the register to pay and your slices will meet you there.

They make it look so nice

They make it look so nice

The prices are around $3 dollars for some of the fancier slices. They are pretty large and 2 will fill the average human up VERY nicely. I like that you can get two completly different kinds of pizza and not pay a premium.

My Top Draft Picks

My Top Draft Picks

The pizza comes out with that perfect cripy bottom and isn’t chewy. The toppings are big and filling. You can literally end up with steak, tortilla chips, beans and many other assorted goodies on your pizza.

They are open very late (2 a.m.ish) which means they will be there when the bars get out. The line gets pretty packed but they have an excellent distribution and line system which keeps it moving.

Whenever I am in Amherst, I always make sure to stop in and grab a slice. I had 5 in about 36 hours of being there this weekend and its just delicious pizza. This style of pizzeria with fancy quick slices could realistically thrive anywhere and with the college crowd it is clearly huge!

Hmm, Ill have that one

Hmm, Ill have that one

Overall I would rank the slices in this fashion

1. Chicken Bacon Ranch

2. Buffalo Chicken

3. Steak Burrito

4. Honey Mustard

5. Chicken Fajita (tortilla chips on it)

6. Straight Cheese (PRO TIP: Don’t wait in line just head to register)

7. Anything else, I mean if you see something that looks delicious just point at it. It is very hard to go wrong here!

Enjoy!

Enjoy!

In my mind, Antonio’s is an absolute must if in the area!

Let me know what you think!

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